Thanksgiving is my favorite holiday. It is a time to spend with family and friends, without the stress of gift-giving as called for by other holidays, and to enjoy delicious food and drink. I recognize, however, that the holidays can be difficult for my clients going through a divorce, and it may not seem like there is a lot to be thankful for during such a difficult time. Even on the darkest of days, however, I encourage my clients to practice gratitude. Finding just one small thing to be thankful for each day can have a huge impact on mindset, outlook, and can be the difference between a swift and amicable resolution to a divorce, versus long protracted litigation.
According to PostivePsychology.com, individuals who practice gratitude are more likely to “experience positive emotions, are more satisfied with life, and experience fewer negative emotions, including depression, anxiety, and envy.” While it is certainly normal and appropriate to experience and express negative emotions, especially while going through a divorce, looking at day to day life through such emotions and allowing them to become all-consuming can have serious, negative consequences on one’s physical and emotional health.
So, in the spirit of this Thanksgiving season, using the letters in the word Thanksgiving, I have made a list of small things to be grateful for while going through a divorce, even when it does not seem there is much to be thankful for. They are:
T- Time with your children.
H – Hellos from strangers.
A – A moment to breathe.
N – Not having to work, a day off.
K – Kisses and hugs from loved ones.
S – Smiles and laughter.
G – Generosity
I – Invitations from friends
V – Visits from family
I – Imagination, the freedom to dream
N – Now, living in the moment
G – Gifts, both tangible and intangible
Hopefully the above is a reminder of the small, positive things that can be focused on when going through a divorce, or just a generally difficult time, and it sparks a bit of gratitude in your life.
Sending warm Thanksgiving wishes to our readership, whom we are most grateful for. Happy Thanksgiving!